Are you emotionally and physically intimate?

Intimacy is More Than Sex

When you hear the word "intimacy" do you think of sex? Sure, sex is part of the intimate connection that couples share. However, there are two others parts of an intimate relationship and they are all equally important.

Emotional Intimacy

Emotional intimacy is simply sharing thoughts and feelings. Many couples do not do this well, if at all. Does your partner know what you are worried about, excited about, hopeful about? Do you know these things for them? What good things do they need to hear, from you, about them? Do you express curiosity about them and their life? If you are not updating these things every day, both ways, you are probably not sharing emotional intimacy in your relationship. To fix this, it means you will have to talk!

Physical Intimacy

This is everything NOT having to do with sex. Do you reach for your partner physically? Do they reach for you? Do you hold hands, cuddle, hug in the morning before you leave for work and when you come home (very important!). If they are not feeling connected and you approach them with a kiss or hug, they are probably thinking you want sex, so they will reject your attempt leaving you feeling rejected. This is a common catalyst for fights. If you want to be physically intimate, you have to reach for your partner, be reassuring, express that you want them when sex is not the immediate goal.

Sex

Not getting enough sex? It might be because your partner is not getting enough emotional intimacy and/or physical intimacy. If they are not feeling connected with you, particularly true for women, it might be because emotional or physical intimacy is missing. Start there and you might be surprised what happens.

January 2012

Relationships & Marriage Counseling

Intimacy is More Than Sex

Emotional Intimacy

Physical Intimacy

Sex